Many drivers in London default to aggression, and it’s unpleasant. If someone changes lanes too quickly, gets cut off, or takes too long to get moving, people get annoyed. They honk, flash their lights, and the show their displeasure. When I’m driving in Malaysia, the roads are less orderly than London. People move into each others space and people cut you off regularly. But no one is angry at each other. There may be a little honk to let you know that they’re there, but there’s no aggression.
Whether we like it or not, defaults everywhere. Every human system has a way of doing things, and people respond others in the system in a predictable way.
As long as people are safe, my preference is for systems that default to tolerance. This is where the attitude is a more relaxed, and where people assume good intent.
I may not be able to change the attitude of London drivers, but I can change the default in my home, teams, and friendship groups. That’s something we all have some influence over.