Dan Cullum

A few of us went horseback riding today. The folks at Tom Wesley in Bariloche run a smooth, professional operation.

The gauchos leading the tours have sun-beaten faces, are draped in their ponchos to keep out the winter cold, and always have their Yerba mate drinks to hand. Their horses are impeccable—well cared for, clean, and healthy. And the ride took us through both forest and mountain tracks, with a mixture of trotting and cantering.

I asked Marcelo, our guide, how long he’d been working for the outfit.

With a wry smile he replied, “A lifetime.”

He then went on to describe his forty years helping people meet horses and explore Patagonia. But what I liked most was his unit of measurement. In two words he described decades worth of work, and thousands of hours of commitment.

It’s rare to find such levels of consistency, but there’s a different gravitas and oomph when we do.

We’ve got a polaroid camera with us on our family trip to Patagonia, but we only have 10 instant films left.

Although we all have our phones that can take great digital photos, it’s been fun searching for those 10 special moments during our 5 day trip.

I always marvel at what constraints—artificial or real—do to bring out our innate creativity.

With a polaroid camera, not only are we left with instant physical reminders of memories, but we’re also finding and capturing moments that we may have otherwise missed.

Give everyone a camera, and they’ll snap a moment slightly differently. As a group, it can allow us to capture things we otherwise would’ve missed.

When working in teams, we often try to quickly settle on a shared point of view, but we risk doing so before we’ve heard from everyone.

Sometimes we can get better results by letting everyone’s film develop before forming our shared perspective.

Maru and I are opting for a delayed honeymoon. We’re saving it for next year.

In the meantime, we’re going with our immediate family (on both sides) to Patagonia. There’s 17 of us in one house for 5 days!

We’re unlikely to have all members of both sides of our family in the same country again, and we saw this as an opportunity to create a unique set of memories.

There are some experiences that are only available to us in specific windows of time. It’s up to us to identify them and take them.

When there’s no safety net, we turn up differently.

We muster more courage. We’re more dogged. We can take more pain.

If the wind, rain, sleet, and snow is lashing our face, and there is no place to stop for the night, we narrow our gaze and are all the more determined to make it back to the warmth of our home.

The past two days have been a whirlwind of joy, emotion, and celebration that is difficult to put into words. Maru and I have created memories with our loved ones we will cherish for a lifetime.

They say we don’t remember the memory itself, but rather the last time we recalled the memory. As the years go by, we risk the memory becoming distorted as bits fall out of the narrative.

So I’m setting aside time today to pen down the experience we lived. It’s not just the big things, like the ceremony itself, but all the small details—especially the small details—that I want to remember. Precisely because there are some interactions and moments that cannot be told through a photo or video, but only through the words of those who lived the experience.

That’s what I’m focusing on today, and time will tell whether it works as an effective time machine back to our special day.

Maru and I are getting married today!

There are a million things happening, and because I want to focus 100% of my attention on her, our families, our friends, and on enjoying this day that we’ve been patiently waiting for since 2019, I’ll be brief.

I could not be more sure of my decision to marry Maru, and I look forward to this day, and all our future days together, with a profound sense of gratitude, hope, and excitement.

Maru and her parents first took me to Borasso 12 years ago. And since then, it’s probably been in my list of top 5 restaurants. It’s not one single thing, but a whole combination of variables, that make the experience great.

First, it’s located out in the Tigre delta, which is a vast collection of rivers, streams, and small islands that flow out to the Rio de La Plata. You can only get to it by small boat, jet ski, or kayak, and so Borasso is at least a half-day trip.

After you wind your way through the maze of rivers and islands, a friendly employee greets you to moor your boat. You’re guided to a modest table in the shade that overlooks the Arroyon creek.

Their portions are generous. And you always order starters and dessert. But it’s the steak that shines. They don’t ask you how you like it cooked, it comes one way: the Borasso way. It’s huge, juicy, and perfectly charred. It’s my favourite steak in the world.

However, the best part about Borasso is the wonderful memories I now carry with me from the visits that have accumulated over the years. It really feels like a place that almost exists in its own little world. Out of mobile phone coverage, and away from the traffic and the noise of Buenos Aires.

Yesterday, my New Zealand family got to experience Borasso for the first time, and I’m sure it’ll be a memory we talk about for years to come.

It only takes 15 mins under a baking sun without sunscreen to begin feeling regretful. The pain often lasts up to week after the burn, and the long term effects of repeated exposure add up over time.

The value of sunblock, on the other hand, is not only felt in the moment and the week after, but over a lifetime of consistent use.

The inconvenience of prevention is often an easy price to pay when we take the long view.

Parkinson’s law is the work always expands to fit the time available.

The final preparations for a wedding is the best example I have of the inverse of Parkinson’s law: the work must shrink to fit the time available.

My tuxedo needed some alterations, so my father-in-law took me to a tailor here in Buenos Aires.

There is a wall covered in photos of the head tailor with famous clients dating back 40 years; most of them Argentine football players, actors, and singers—including a few with Diego Maradona!

What’s amazing is seeing the tailor age across the decades. In all the photos he carries the same smile, the same bushy moustache, with only his hair getting a little greyer the further you walk along the wall.

I love examples of immense dedication, consistency, and commitment to a craft. This tailor has the photographic evidence to prove his. And it shows!

Soon after we learn our ABCs, we get a choice.

We can try to Always Be Correct, or we can try to Always Be Curious.

That choice isn’t fixed either. We can change it at any moment, in any situation.

And when we change, the world and it’s possibilities morph around us accordingly.

We’ve got about 60 people flying in for our wedding, and for many of them, it’ll be their first time in Latin America. A significant proportion are taking a week or two to travel within Argentina or the continent.

The photos from the folks travelling before our events are starting to roll into our WhatsApp and social media feeds, and Maru and I are thrilled to see people hiking in Patagonia, visiting the deserts in Chile, and soaking up the sun on Colombia.

In all the build up and preparation, I didn’t even think about all the enjoyment I’d get from seeing friends in new landscapes, eating great food, and exploring this great land.

Vicarious joy.

I’ve just signed off from work for the next three weeks, and during this time I’ll be focusing entirely on Maru and my wedding and spending time with our family and friends.

This is the longest break I’ve taken since moving to the UK, and after delaying our wedding for 3 years, we’re more than ready to celebrate!

I’m choosing to be grateful in advance for the experiences we’ll have over the coming weeks, and I’m determined to be intentional by pausing each day to soak it all in.

I recently discovered the LoFi Lord of the Rings playlist on Spotify, and I love it.

LoFi is an interesting genre. The LoFi stands for low fidelity, meaning there are intentional imperfections. These could be incorrect notes, environmental noises, or audio blemishes. LoFi gives a track a more earthy, homemade feel. People often like to work and relax to LoFi music because it’s distinctively laidback.

Combine all the above with the Lord of the Rings soundtrack and you get an epic but relaxed soundscape. I’m really enjoying putting on the playlist for periods of focused work. Enjoy!