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Oliver Burkeman has a great saying, “Everyone is totally winging it”.

So worry less. People aren’t looking at you and critiquing you, they’re too worried about looking like a goof themselves.

Give it a go. Loosen up. Say it plain and shoot straight.

Everyone is totally winging it.

I was on the tube on Sunday afternoon in central London and saw swathes of runners hopping on the Underground.

They were buoyant. They’d just finished the London Marathon after all.

It was impressive to imagine the millions of hours of training that the more than 50,000 participants would have done in preparation for the race.

I didn’t know the London Marathon is the most popular marathon in the world. If you enter the public ballot you have a 3% chance of getting a spot.

It made sense to me why all the runners were elated. It’s not just about finishing the marathon, that’s certainly important, but it’s also about getting to the starting line of a race that so many want to do, but most never get the chance.

Maru and I have adopted a principle in our home and we remind each other of it often: why risk a lot to gain a little.

It’s not that we’re choosing to be conservative at every turn, but it’s a commitment to objectively looking at a situation and calculate what could be lost vs. gained.

And although we use it for big decisions, we use it for small things too. For example, being a little late to an event by driving a little slower on a dark, rainy London evening is a trade-off that we’re both happy with.

To gain a little, don’t risk losing a lot.

Experiences have Best Before dates too.

That backpacking journey in my early twenties was a priceless adventure, but sleeping in a small room at a hostel with eleven other people is not something I’m signing up for now.

Seeing my favourite band in the front row of a heaving mass of people was great when I was sixteen, but I now prefer to appreciate the show from the stands.

Kids only believe in Santa for a short 4-5 year period, the magic of their belief and joy is real for less time than we realise.

Some things have a window when they’re best experienced. It’s worth consciously thinking about them and planning accordingly.

You can measure, test, and calculate.

You can also use your gut, sense what’s right, and go on a feeling.

You can use a ruler, and you can eyeball it.

It doesn’t have to be one or the other.

The more storage space we have, the more we keep.

We justify holding on to a large number of things we don’t need simply because we have the room to hold them.

But with every additional thing, there’s a mental maintenance cost we need to pay. Even if that cost is small, the pennies add up.

Sometimes there’s value in having less storage space: it helps us discern which are the essential things and which are the things we can let go of.

The first 5-10 minutes of exercise is for warming up. It seems obvious, but it’s so often ignored—and I’m writing about it today because I need a reminder.

Pace? It doesn’t matter.

Heart rate? It doesn’t matter.

Weight? It doesn’t matter.

What matters is listening to our bodies, easing into it, and enjoying the workout.

Winning is no longer about coming first, it’s about being able to turn up tomorrow.

The moment someone loses their cool, their odds on winning the debate fall close to zero.

This is because losing one’s cool is perceived as showing a lack of respect towards another person or people in the room.

And most positive progress, at home, at work, and with friends, is built first on a base of mutual respect.

Keeping one’s cool, building on a foundation of respect, and working through the tough stuff. That’s the game.

A colleague and I were discussing what it’s like to go surfing after an extended break, say more than 1 year between sessions.

The first time you get back in the water with a board, you fall off all the time and feel uncoordinated.

After a few hours, you get back into the swing of things, and hopefully are a little more ready for the next session.

It got me thinking about one of the biggest benefits of keeping a daily blog. Each day is like a wave rolling in, and each blog post is a decision to ride it. If you do it every day, you rarely feel uncoordinated.

That doesn’t mean one has no room for improvement. There’s always a new wave coming and a better way to catch that wave.

Sometimes, we’ll need to go the long way round.

That’s when there’s no shortcut, no quick win, and no panacea.

The long way round requires grit, resilience, and the ability to dance with tough trade-offs. It puts us to the test and asks us if we’re willing to put in the work to get to our goal.

The best views are often found after arduous climbs and winding routes that follow the long way round.

I recently dealt with a small mould problem in a storage unit.

I wore gloves, masked up, and got scrubbing. It was grim work.

One spray and wipe wasn’t good enough. To make sure I had eliminated the problem, I kept scrubbing until there was no trace of mould to be found on a fresh wipe.

Anything less and I was inviting the problem to return.

The cleaning episode got me thinking about parallels in the workplace. When there is an issue, it’s important to roll up our sleeves and work until the issue is completely resolved.

A half-hearted job is a recipe for further messy work down the line.

Call it a weird relaxation habit, but I love listening to Lord of the Rings read by Andy Serkis.

Serkis, who played Gollum in the films, does all the voices and is a delight to listen to.

The thing is I’m not here for the ending. I know how it ends. I know the twists, and I know the turns.

I’m here for the journey. And that’s what makes it special.

Maru and I were putting together a cabinet yesterday for our new flat and we quickly fell into a rhythm.

Maru put pieces together and looked ahead to the next step. And I did the screwing and bolting of things into place.

We each played our role, knew what role the other was playing, and helped when the other person needed a hand.

It was a reminder for me about what a team needs: the right people in the right roles who think carefully and thoughtfully about both their work and the work.

Allow a little more of it.

Before you send out that document. Make a decision. Buy that item. Make that investment.

Go for a walk. Do some gardening. Listen to your favourite album. Read a novel.

The subconscious does great work if we give it space.

Most of us have items on our mental to-do lists. They could be for our jobs, for the home, for our finances, or for our family and friends.

These tasks aren’t critical, so we defer them. But over time our backlog builds, and with each day that passes a small amount of energy is required to maintain the list.

One thing I’ve realised is acknowledging the mental load exists is a helpful first step. The second thing is blocking out a period of time to get these things off my plate. Ticking off items in a piecemeal fashion just adds to the stress, but getting a handful of things done in one go helps to alleviate the mental load.